Stuck with the sentiment

My Boy just turned four. As much as it was a great day for him, I felt a tad nostalgic. While I admit he’s small for his age, he is quickly becoming far to opinionated and head strong to be deemed a baby anymore. 

Gone are the overly chubby cheeks and gummy grins. I’m dreading removing all the clothes he’s grown out of from his wardrobe to make room for the newly needed ones. What do to with the old? Do I hang on to them? Store them in a cupboard? If so, what for? He’ll not wear them again, and he’ll not have a sibling who’ll need them. I'd just be adding to the already burgeoning pile of clothes. 

Sentiment is such a powerful driver. Like loyalty, it is managed in the brain where emotion is formulated, but not reason. There is no reasoning for loyalty or sentiment. Both are an emotional hook. Is that why making emotional decisions is so difficult? Because the process does not take place in the reasoning part of our brain? 

Oh dear, I think I’ll just hang onto them for a while longer. Perhaps with time the sentimental attachment will dissipate allowing the reasoning part of my brain to logically decide they are best deposited in the charity bin.  

Soon but just not.....yet. 

Review of CARS2 based on the reaction from my 3 year old.

Today we saw the 10:15am am session of Cars2 with our 3yr old. While he seemed to enjoy most of the film and certainly was transfixed for the duration,  at 7:30pm we're still fielding questions from him about the violence.

I don't believe this film should have been rated G. At the very least it should have been PG.

I don't dispute it's a great animation and has a fantastic soundtrack that my son frequently bopped along too, but I also think it's an inappropriate visual experience for smaller children. When asked if he wanted to see the movie again my son said 'No'. When asked 'why?' he responded in a way indicating that the characters representing the 'bad guys' scared the crap out of him. 

While these Pixar films typically have dual layers of storyline (one for the kids and one more subtle for Adults), I think this time the balance was the wrong way round. My husband and I agreed the Adult level storyline including the violence and implied murder and espionage was hardly masked, while there was really very little in the way of child friendly morals and funny tales for the younger child. 

Now I'm not sure, (because my child is only 3years old) but I'd guess this is more suited to kids around  8years old. 

I wouldn't have expected to be dealing with questions from my 3yr old about death 9hours after seeing the film. It certainly left an impression on him but I dare say not the best one!

Why do they never believe you until they have tested it for themselves

Okay so we go shopping and make our way around the isles. Something catches my 3year olds' attention.

'I want that one' he announces.
'You won't like it' is my reply.
'I will like it it's green like Ben 10. I want it Mum, I'm thirsssssssty!'

I pick up the product in question, I scan the label. Go Coco, Coconut water drink. apparently it's Natures Sports water. No preservatives, natural colour and flavour, I scan the ingredients and nutrition panel and no longer object to the purchase...

'Alright, but you won't like it' I warn.
'I'm telling you Mum I will love it' he scorns defiantly.

Our trolley is less than 10 meters from the store before his head is diving into the bags scouring for his prized win. Eureka he's found it.

'Open it Mum? I'm thirsssssssty'.

I obligingly twist off the lid and remove the foil safety seal before handing the bottle over to his excited grasp.

'Yum!' He declares before the drink has had a chance to register with his taste buds.

'Humph', perhaps I was wrong. No matter if I am, it seems like a pretty nutritious product.

We head home and unpack the remainder of our purchases. (Well I'm unpacking, he's acting as quality control).

He perches himself at the breakfast bar with a tub of diced fruit and his bottle of Go Coco. He takes another swig and shudders.

'Mum I really love the colour, but the flavour isn't as good as something else'
'Don't you like it Alexander?'
'Yeah I do, it just doesn't have a good flavour'.

I take a swig myself in jest, and almost spray the product across my kitchen.

'Ugh! Next time we're at the shops and I tell you that you won't like something, will you listen to me?'

'Okay Mum, can we put it in the bin now? It's a really good colour but I think it tastes just a little bit yuck. I think they left out something because other green Ben 10 drinks taste so good to me'.

Indigestion.

Well I'm feeling very aligned with that old saying "bitten off more than you can chew" today.

I'm blogging right now in a (not so veiled) attempt at procrastinating.

If I had to articulate the daily responsibilities of my life in the style of a position description, I'd likely fail as the general belief is, such documents should be kept succinct!

A few tags I'd add under the 'full time' column would be Wife, Mother, Domestic Goddess, Manager, Negotiations Consultant, Crisis Management, the all round 'go-to girl'

I'm feeling swamped. Between my home life with my husband and 3year old, my work life where I manage a team of staff split over two geographic operational centres, I've now realised, I'm somehow signed up for FOUR courses.

I have several assignments currently underway, and a project at home

involving 'night time toilet training' so the sleep deprivation is really aiding my desire to leave this page, and head back over to my word file. **Insert sarcastic tone here** I'm sure I'd feel more motivated if the word file for my assignment wasn't considerably more 'blank' than this blog!

How did this happen? How can I possibly have signed up for so many different courses? I'm going to blame the night time toilet training! I must have fallen asleep at work due to the sleep deprivation, and during a phase of 'sleepworking' done the unthinkable... Made too many commitments.

Sleep tight angels

So it's Mothers day. For many that means kids bouncing on the bed in the morning screaming excitedly while Dad carries in a tray of breakfast. For others it means a family day out or even a day 'off'. For single Mums, it may mean another challenging day ahead but still feeling blessed thanks to her kids.

This morning I got what I wished for. A sleep in. In fact when I awoke the house was quiet, empty....barren

While on Mothers Day I am eternally grateful I am a Mother. I am more of a Mother than many know. I have born one Son. A beautify healthy full of life (and attitude) son. He is the centre of my life. He is my motivation to get out of bed every day. I work to provide him a lifestyle I would never have dreamed of as a child. And while I am very grateful I have him, there are four others I have lost.

I remember my four sleeping Angels on Mothers day. For me Mothers day is a day of remembrance and mourning. It is a day I find hard to 'celebrate' I paste on a smile, take my own Mother to lunch accept all the benign well wishes from those oblivious and carry on... as so many women do.

On Mothers day I remember my Angels born sleeping, My friends who have endured this same palpable loss and I pray that my child will never know this depth of loss.

I wish for all the 'innocents' out there that they remain so. That they experience the wonder of an innocent pregnancy never fearing or doubting a 'successful' outcome. That they never have to live with the daily anxiety that comes with pregnancy wondering when the inevitble loss will occur. Never having to deal with the fact they have born a live child and wondered, 'How the fuck did that happen?' and then have to figure out how bond with a child they never expected to arrive because for the duration of pregnancy you prepare yourself to deal with another expected loss.

Mothers day is a double whammy for me, and it may also be the same for someone you know.
I envy your innocence. I'm jealous of your trust in life. Do not judge me for spoiling my child. He is the only child I will have.

The Devil is in the Detail

Okay I am looking quizzically at my phone as I see an incoming call from my Dad.  During working hours that's a little out of character. After all, I'm a very busy woman. Must be something serious right?

I answer - curiosity peaked.

So he tells me he's driving to the airport. I knew this would be the case. We'd already discussed 'the plan' the night before. He was taking my Aunt to the airport for her return trip to Perth after a week in Sydney.
So far, my peaked curiosity is feeling a little disappointed. After all, nothing exciting here right? Humph

Dad's tone is very........... measured.

Aunty is in the car with him of course.

I'm then asked a favour....

Would I mind ringing Mum to let her know she may need to delay stripping the guest bed?

But why? (wow, in my head I sound like an annoying child in the back seat of a car on a long drive)

It would seem that Aunty's flight was......... A.M. NOT P.M.

I now understand. Dad is ringing me using his measured voice desperatley trying to convey in the most innocuous possible way, how profoundly pissed off he is at this glaringly inconvenient circumstance he now finds himself.

All I can think to say is 'Oops, didn't anyone confirm the flight yesterday? Aren't you supposed to do check the day before?'

Measure voice responds ' There must have been an oversight'
Oh crap, he's fuming and can't let off steam with Aunty in the car. I wonder if I'm on speaker phone? Better not ask anymore about who booked the flights etc. After all, what good would that do now?

I suggest they keep heading to the airport anyway. Lucky for EVERYONE she managed to buy a seat on a later flight...

when booking your flights, be sure to check the detail. That AM/PM drop down box.......it's a doozy!